13 Éxitos que Nunca Oirás: A Serial Poem (Part 4)

According to Urban Dictionary.com, there are several definitions for the term ‘Jasper’. These definitions range from:
1. Jasper
To perform a sex act on a coworker. If performed in the place of employment, this can be called the Full Jasper.

"I just jaspered that hot chick from work!"
to:
11. Jasper
Jewish Anglo-Saxon Protestant. Used by some Jews in Northern California to describe people of Jewish heritage who have completely assimilated into white gentile culture to the point that they are indistinguishable from WASPs, or people who seem like WASPs but are Jewish or half-Jewish.

“He seems so goyish, but he's really a jasper.”

However, when first I looked the word up, the first definition was:
14. Jasper
A name used to describe a hopeless lover.

“Yo man you need to grow some balls and stop being a Jasper!”

This is what I took as the meaning of ‘Jasper’ when Mary said:
“You boys are total Jaspers.”